The Power of a Smile

Don’t just smile for photos. The few seconds it takes to smile—anytime and often–has tremendous value and it’s free.

My favorite columnist, Harvey Mackay, reminded me that it’s National Smile Week, held annually during the second week of August.

 

Did you know these facts about smiling?

  • A smile improves your looks and takes years off your appearance.
  • Smiling makes you more approachable, increases your attractiveness, makes you appear more intelligent and improves relationships. Smiling conveys a message of happiness, approachability, and confidence. (These are things managers typically look for in employees.)
  • Health benefits from smiling are enormous, Research has shown that a smile is a natural antidepressant; it reduces stress/anxiety and elevates moods. Smiles can help the immune system, lower blood pressure, and even serve as a pain reliever.
  • Because smiling has the power to reduce stress, it increases your ability to deal with trying situations.  Why? Smiling boosts endorphin output and forces us to breathe deeper, resulting in a calmer outlook and increased coping ability.
  • Smiling encourages positive thinking. When dealing with a negative situation, a candid smile inspires positivity.
  • If you’re having a bad day, force yourself to smile. Research suggests that the act of smiling can actually trick the brain into feeling happier, no matter how bad the current situation may be.
  • Smiling is contagious. Just think — you can help another improve their well-being by giving them a chance to smile back! Happy people influence the people closest to them and provide a boost of good energy. So, next time you’re feeling down, seek out your happiest friend and let the smiles begin.
  • No matter where you are in the world, smiling is recognized as a universal display of happiness and good nature.

In my book Managing MS, here’s one of the tips I share for how to deal with people when you have MS:

“Smiles and kindness go a long way–

Even if you feel crabby, fake a smile anyway. We need people and most of us like to interact with people. I’m almost always nice and smiling at people. When I ask for help, which in my case I have to ask for help a lot, I get what I need with a smile back. If I’m in a grocery store and can’t reach an item, I’ll nicely ask “When you have a moment, would you reach something for me?” I always get help, usually followed by the offer to let them know if I need anything else.

When I was in the hospital last year, even though I felt miserable I always was kind and patient with the nurses. The nurses would actually give me extra attention, because they would remark how cranky everyone else was. They would sometimes hang out for a few minutes to yak, which actually elevated my moods. It’s hard to do when you yourself are feeling so miserable, but the positive responses back are worth it.”

Don’t you think that if people smiled more, it would help make the world a kinder and happier place? While smiling certainly doesn’t fix all problems, it certainly has the power to make us feel just a little better at any given moment.

Debbie Petrina                                       
Author of Managing MS   
Moderator, MultipleSclerosis.net 

 

A Remarkable Story about Life in Bush Alaska

Melissa Cook spent twenty years living and teaching in remote Alaska.  She is now an award-winning author of her memoir The Call of the Last Frontier. Melissa has MS and authors her blog MSsymptoms.me.  I just finished reading her book and want to tell you what I think:

Read it! You’ll be glad you did.

I have MS and took a 16-day land and sea tour of Alaska some years ago. My visiting experience is miniscule compared to this admirable memoir of Cook’s life in the Last Frontier. Our luxury cruise ship navigated an horrific 2-day storm with 90 mph winds off the coast of Ketchikan. To read about what it took to live through similar winds and constant rains in the bush is unimaginable.

Visiting Alaska was wondrous, but Melissa’s personal account of living there is extraordinary through her eyes, words, senses, and thoughts.  There is little more I can add to other reviews of her book on Amazon, BookBub, and Goodreads.  Brave isn’t a big enough word to describe her “adventure” as she refers to it. I have grit, but not this much.

The only thing I wonder about is the extent MS really had on her; I think she downplayed its true impact on her physically, mentally, and emotionally. Nevertheless, her strength and resilience to survive the Alaskan bush with MS is remarkable.

Melissa now lives in Wyoming and documents her current adventures on her You Tube channel, Wyoming Jeepers. (I’ll stick with cruises!)

If you read Melissa Cook’s book, be sure to write a review telling her what you think.

Debbie Petrina
Author of Managing MS 
Moderator, MultipleSclerosis.net 

Is There Light at the End of the Tunnel?

On the cusp of our MS diagnosis, we are gripped by fear and panic. With no cure, we envision ourselves entering a dark tunnel of unknowns. How do we begin living with it? What will life be like? What will be at the other end of the tunnel? A never-ending list of questions follow.

Years ago, I read a story about a lady who was on her way to her dream vacation in Italy. Somehow, the plane got diverted, and she ended up in Holland. The dream was shattered, and now she was in a country she knew nothing about. Grief—denial, anger, sadness, bargaining… Having no choice in the matter, she finally accepted her fate.

The lady took action and learned about Holland as quickly as she could. She discovered that Holland turned out much better than she expected. There were tulips, windmills, Anne Frank’s house, Van Gogh Museum, amazing architecture, canals, gouda cheese………

Forty-two years ago, I was looking into that dark tunnel. I took action to make the best of an unplanned situation.  Now, 42 years later, I’m on the other side of the tunnel.  It all turned out much better than I expected. As I travelled through the tunnel, the light at the end got bigger and brighter. The grief in my “Good grief!” moment evolved into something I call “good” grief.  It’s all explained in my book.

Opportunities aren’t opportunities unless you act on them. If you make the best out of an unplanned circumstance, it may turn out better than you thought.

Is there light at the end of the tunnel?  The choice is yours.

 

Debbie Petrina
Author of Managing MS 
       Kindle Unlimited
Moderator, MultipleSclerosis.net 

The Age of Overkill

Overkill: “An excess of something (such as a quantity or an action) beyond what is required or suitable for a particular purpose.”

Life was simple in the 1950’s. Throughout my long life, I’ve witnessed the evolution of product choices, variety, and quantity. Vehicles, foods, gadgets, electronics, medicine… On the one hand, it’s wonderful to have so many things to choose from. On the other hand, more isn’t necessarily better.

Overkill is stressful; it takes a lot of time and energy to figure out what/where/how to buy something and which is the best value.  The learning curve is constant with new updates and inventions to try or buy. Overkill can easily lead to over-spending, over-shopping, over-eating, over-doing, over-treating…Overkill can even kill.

Especially in the medical field. Our medicine cabinet in the 1950’s contained aspirin, Pepto-Bismol, Caladryl, bandaids, a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and a thermometer. We had annual checkups with our GP and eye doctors at their home offices; emergencies in between were handled by a single call and a same-day visit.

Today, the quantity and types of doctors, specialists, tests, medications/treatments are amazing. Obviously, having what is available in medicine is tremendous for our health and wellness needs. The downside, however, is that the excess of so many options with doctors, treatments and healthcare specialties has created complicated health management. And legal ramifications (another topic, another time.)

?????????

Who takes care of coordinating our previous/current day status of doctors and medications?  Many people assume that current-day technology does this. Others assume their PCP does this. During a visit with my PCP yesterday, my list of meds was not updated since our visit six months ago. Only one of the four specialists I had seen sent him an update of that visit. It was no surprise to either one of us. Dr. S. added that it’s a now a common problem, and it’s being exacerbated by the increasing number of specialists.

Age brings wisdom. Having lived for 67 years, (42 of them w/ MS), gave me quite an education with doctors and medicine.  My own health team grew to include many PCPs, 8+ MD Specialists, P/T & O/T to help just about every part of my body. I can’t count how many times or days I spent in hospitals for myself or other family members.

Who keeps track of my medical management? I do, because the  constant change of all variables over time can’t possibly be coordinated by anyone else. If anyone believes that their PCP, insurance, computers, etc. does this, they are mistaken.

I have always kept a journal and made sure every drug, doctor, pharmacist was up-to-date and connected with my current health status. For every new visit and prescription.  It’s my responsibility, even if a screw-up happens in our health system (that does a great job of covering their butts).

Another consideration: who do you trust as a backup for your medical management if you get in a situation that you can’t do it on your own?

In a recent blog article, I told the story of my mother.  Poor medical management almost killed her. Assisting my stepdad with her care management since January revealed many previous mishaps. During the past couple of years, she had been overmedicated and prescribed several wrong medications. Doctors (i.e., PCP, neurologist, GI specialist….) were not coordinated with her meds and updates; follow-up visits with the team of doctors did not occur. Stepdad is her health care manager; but in some cases, two heads are better than one.

It’s complicated to live nowadays. It’s complicated when sickness befalls us. It’s complicated when we grow old. It’s complicated to die. Crap happens when you least expect it, whether it’s you, your partner, your parents……..

Medicine is complicated. I don’t trust anyone but myself with my medical management. I read every word in every document before I sign it. My husband is my backup.

What about you?

 

Debbie Petrina
Author of Managing MS 
       Kindle Unlimited
Moderator, MultipleSclerosis.net 

 

Personal and Private Meetings

Is something hidden in your closet? Or do you need help decluttering it?

Everyone keeps things hidden in the back of their closet; I used to, but not anymore. If you were seeing a therapist/psychiatrist, would you tell? Or are you someone who thinks you don’t need one or can work things out on your own?

I am an open person with an open mind, mouth, ears. and eyes.  This is how I learn.  I’m also an open book and incredibly honest.  I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember. If you have read my new release Managing MS, you found this out because of many personal stories shared, especially about some taboo subjects.

People learn from other people. My long life of 67 years (42 w/ MS) has given me constant reason to expose some of my private self.  By doing so, I can bring awareness and help to others even if it’s in the smallest way.

This week I had my three-month appointment with my psychiatrist. Because of current laws, this is required for me in order to get a prescription for sleeping pills. Initially. I was annoyed that I had to add a regular psychiatrist appointment to my already busy schedule for the sole purpose of pills. But I’ve come to look forward to these appointments for a variety of reasons.  She’s an anonymous, unbiased person who listens to me, talks with me, and stands by if I need a lifeline.

I’m a great listener; I’ve been told many times from many people over many years from those who talked with me in confidence. But there are times when Debbie needs a Debbie. I don’t like feeling alone about some things.

In the past, I’ve had short periods of behavioral therapy to work through some major problems life threw at me. Family deaths, an MS dx, disability and job loss to name a few. I learned coping tools from these therapies, through lifelong support groups and other instruction like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). What these regular appointments do is keep me on track with my own behavior. Sort of like how a regular performance review or staff meeting keeps you on track with your job.

My life lately has been chaotic, overwhelming, and stressful.  Knowing that this appointment was coming up this week steered me to hunker down and put my honest thoughts on paper. What’s my status, and what could I do? I wasn’t handling relationships well; I was oversensitive; I was angry that too many things in daily life were so difficult to do…  The world is changing so fast, I can’t keep up, and I felt like I was in quicksand. My cluttered closet needed organized.

I felt prepared when the appointment began and shared my situation. No, I wasn’t depressed; I had high anxiety and for me, there is a difference. No, I don’t want anything for my anxiety; it’s my own fault and I can fix that.  I had taken my DBT manual off the shelf to review. Yes–“Use more Teflon–Don’t let things stick.” “Let go of toxic people and things.”  “Set boundaries and say ‘no’.”  “Don’t ‘should’ yourself or others.” “Change what you can and accept what you can’t.”

Yes—accept that I AM older and have an advanced chronic illness.  A good friend recently said I was Wonder Woman, but that has backfired on me because I had set the bar too high for my own and others’ expectations of me.  Yes—don’t cheat yourself from retirement. Yes– watch inspirational documentaries and reading novels every afternoon while lying down to declutter the busy brain.

I can’t change the world, others, or my age; however, I can change how I deal with it. Personal, private meetings have value when you are comfortable with the person facing you. Validation and sincere feedback are important especially when it is unbiased and anonymous.

Airing out my closet and organizing it from time to time lessens my internal stress and recharges my batteries.

So, how is your closet?

 

Debbie Petrina
Author of Managing MS
Community Advocate for MultipleSclerosis.net 

www.DebbieMS.com

 

 

 

What Do You Do All Day?

March 15, 2022

My occupation is now “retired” after being on long-term disability for years.  Child rearing is over. From time to time, the question surfaces, “What do you do all day?”

Now that’s one of those questions that can be tricky to answer, like the question, “How do you feel?”  It depends on who’s asking and what mood you’re currently in.  It’s
a judgment call.

If it’s a casual acquaintance, I give them a few of the basics: I rest intermittently, exercise or swim, read, write, and volunteer when I can.  One of those subjects will usually switch the conversation toward another direction.  There is no sense in getting into the details of what a typical day is really like; it would probably make them uncomfortable, speechless, and sorry they asked.

Besides, everyone throughout their life has something of their own to deal with. Or, getting too specific about what I do can lead into unwanted conversation.  For example, there are the people who want to give advice about all kinds of things, which can get annoying if they really do not understand MS.  And then there are the “one-uppers”; who are more interested telling a personal story that is far worse than your situation.

But occasionally, someone asks me that question in a way with a certain tone that will get a rise out of me.  “So, what do you do all day?”   Even when I used a cane, then a walker, and now a wheelchair; I usually “look so good” and am smiling and perky.  I keep busy, rarely complaining.  It’s like they’re wondering why I got disability from the government or why I don’t want to go out somewhere.

Like most people with MS, I do things on my own as much as possible and strive to maintain independence. But that sometimes can backfire on me. It conveys a message that “I can do it; all is well…” Then if superwoman starts to fall apart, I’m asked “What’s wrong with you?”

We folks with MS endure invisible things like the fatigue, depression, numbness, and weakness that make life complicated.  It doesn’t matter whether we are in a wheelchair or not. We have kids and grandkids, chores to do, errands to run, households to maintain, finances to manage.  Life without a chronic illness is challenging enough.  Throw in MS and the time and energy it takes to do a task double or triples. Often, many things get done differently, partly, or not at all.

But how do you explain all this?  Should you try?  Do they really want to know?  If you think so, maybe take the opportunity to say, “not as much as I’d like, I can use some help.” Or is it easier to just say one thing, and then ask in return “What do you do all day?”

Again, it’s a judgement call.

Debbie Petrina
Author of Managing MS
Community Advocate for MultipleSclerosis.net 

www.DebbieMS.com

 

An MS Journey

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“A Picture of Health on the Outside”

I was only 25 in 1980 when my MS symptoms started. My career was taking off, I was newly married, and my husband and I were active outdoors doing things like skiing and dirt bike riding. Life was good. But like all newly-diagnosed people with MS, the fear of having the rest of my life ahead of me with a chronic, debilitating, progressive disease with no cure was frightening to say the least.

What kind of life could I expect?

Flash forward to present day, 35 years later. Life has been good despite the challenges of living with MS while also dealing with other challenges in life that “normal” people endure. Adjustments to changes in my life seemed constant, as my MS Blogger Buddy Nicole Lemelle would say, would become “My New Normal.” And I’m currently facing two more…

Truthfully, I hate MS—it’s interfering, unpredictable, and invisible in so many ways. I didn’t have a choice about getting it, but I did have a choice about whether I was going to let it control me or manage my life. It took time, but I learned to manage my MS well. It helped that I am a positive person with an “I can do this” attitude.

Difficult decisions had to be made—giving up my career, having only one child, going on disability, having to move out of my house… It was hard. But amazingly for me, in the end each difficult decision resulted in a good outcome.

I can honestly say that I have, and will continue to have a fulfilling  life with my husband of thirty-seven years and my 32-year old son. Not only have I been an avid swimmer, crafter, and reader for as long as I can remember, my love of history and nature was satisfied after visiting all fifty States, seven countries in Europe, Canada, Mexico and the Caribbean. Many of these trips I made in a wheelchair.

As I journeyed through motherhood, I enjoyed being a soccer mom, wrestling mom, homeroom mother, and a volunteer in my son’s school, church and community. In-between, I learned Spanish and tutored high-schoolers for fifteen years. And I was involved as a volunteer and in other roles in the MS community for the past thirty years. I’m proud to say I authored a book, Managing MS: Straight-Talk…  published in January 2012, and since then learned social media and built a website through which I have interacted within the MS community since.

I have always practiced health and wellness as a critical component of managing my MS and chose my medications carefully. Good sleep, regular fitness, healthy diet choices, stress management… Recently at my annual physical, my doctor said to me “I have good news and I have bad news.”

The good news? Out of all her patients that day, I was the healthiest– perfect scores on all my tests: blood pressure, weight, cholesterol, pulse, circulation, Vitamin D, calcium, and all the other things that are measured when blood is checked.

The bad news? I have severe osteoporosis in my hips and osteopenia in my spine—the worse she has ever seen. I had most of the risk factors for it: genetics, years of steroids, being thin, post-menopausal, and little weight-bearing fitness due to being in a wheelchair for fifteen years. The first of two new adjustments that I have to research and work on. This is serious stuff.

When you look at that picture of me, it is a definite portrayal of that old expression that makes all of us with MS cringe: “But you look so good!” You can’t see the osteoporosis, just like you can’t see so many of my MS symptoms. Though I use a scooter or wheelchair because I can’t walk anymore, many folks have asked me if I had an accident. They can’t see the pain, the numbness, weakness, the bladder/bowel problems, or the fatigue and emotional issues that I live with daily.

And now that the new ridiculous TV commercial about Tecfidera is airing, people are getting the misconception that there is a pill—a cure—that Relapsing/Remitting MSers can take that will give them the ability to be active and normal all day long. What a hurtful setback for me and all of the other MS patients that have been trying so hard to get people to understand what MS really is all about.

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                                                     Shame on you, Biogen.

I don’t know. At first I thought that no awareness was better than misleading awareness, but maybe this commercial will stir up the pot and get people talking more about MS.

 

Throughout my entire life, I have always been a doer and a helper with some purpose to serve. Even in the toughest spells throughout my life due to MS or something else, I forged forward to reach out. However, I’ve reached the point where I’m so tired and I hurt almost all the time now. I have been wrestling with this question for a while, “Is it time to quit?” That means the second, big adjustment into unknown territory—true retirement.

 

Actually, I won’t let go of everything completely; I will share and care about MS on a limited basis through my social media sites. But I’ll let the MS blogging be carried on by great, credible others that I got the privilege of knowing from social media and attendance to a MS Blogger Summit sponsored by EMD-Serono/Pfizer:

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MS Bloggers and some Significant-Other Caretakers

   (Sitting, L to R)
Laura Kolaczkowski
Lisa Emrich
Nicole Lemelle,
Lisa Dasis
Yvonne Desousa
Debbie Petrina
(Standing, L to R)
Jon Chandonnet
David Lyons
Stuart Schlossman
Dave Bexfield

There are other great MS bloggers around too, such as those on Multiple Sclerosis.net, that can be trusted to obtain quality MS info, inspiration and education.

Living with MS for 35 years and being involved with the MS community in so many ways teaches a person a lot of things. This is the last page of my practical MS guide book Managing MS: Straight Talk From a 31-Year Survivor that I published in January 2012:

Final Words of Inspiration

September 28, 2011

Life is precious, challenging, and worth getting out of it what you can.
Being a lover of American history, one of the items on my bucket list was to visit the actual trail of the Lewis & Clark expedition. I just returned from an RV road trip with my husband and brother to do this. During the trip, I reflected on the similarities of their journey and life with MS.

When Lewis & Clark began their journey to the Pacific Ocean across the continent, they went into unknown territory. Daily they encountered obstacles in the wilderness they had to overcome, and had to rely heavily on the support of each other/ strangers, their skills, ingenuity, and creativity in order to survive and prevail. The team of thirty-three persons suffered; one died. They experimented. They documented. They learned. They managed and accomplished incredible hardships. There were moments of the deep despair and defeat, and moments of high joy and success.

They found their way. I found my way. You will find your way.

                                                                                       Debbie

www.DebbieMS.com 
Author, MS Counselor/Consultant

 

*Image courtesy of “rakratchada torsap” portfolio at Free DigitalPhotos.net

Why MS Doesn’t Scare Me Anymore

“Overcoming Fear”

January 11, 2015

Fear can be paralyzing. It interferes or overtakes one’s thoughts and actions. Fear causes immense stress. People with MS are confronted with it before, during and after diagnosis constantly. After all, there is no cure for MS, no two cases are alike, and it is highly unpredictable in its course.

To make matters worse, fear is intensified by what is read or said by others, health professionals and social media. The fear of ending up in a wheelchair or becoming very mobility impaired; the fear of losing cognitive abilities, the fear of losing employment or becoming incapacitated….

Even MS Associations who try to portray MS in a positive light often unintentionally create fear due to their messages of “get on a treatment ASAP” or “you need to call your doctor…” Lately, all of the emphasis on cognitive issues causes misconceptions that losing one’s mental faculties is inevitable; or a memory problem such as brain fog is due to MS.

I lived with that fear of the unknown, and with the thoughts of the many “what-if scenarios.” After my first ten years of living with MS, I didn’t fear it anymore; and I still don’t.

Why not?

• As time went, I realized that the more knowledge and experience I gained, the less fear I had. I got to know my body relative to my own MS patterns and responses, adjusted my lifestyle, and learned how to manage both my MS and my personal life. I felt more in control of my MS; the more control I acquired, the less fear I had. Yes—MS is a manageable disease.

The most common triggers of MS symptoms are stress, fatigue, and temperature/weather changes. Learning how to manage these triggers usually settle the symptoms down and prevent a relapse. By not managing them, they will become chronic which will lead to a flare/relapse.

• Research taught me that statistics were on my side. Here are some major fears, with research to show that they are not as bad as many think:

**It is estimated that 40-50% of people with MS experience mild to moderate impairment; severe cognitive decline like dementia are extremely rare (source: MSIF.org). Check out this MS post—“Are Cognitive Problems Blamed Too Much on MS?”

** Over a lifetime, only 20-25% end up confined to a wheelchair. That was the statistic in 1980, and it probably is less today due to the development of the disease-modifying drugs that have been available since the mid-90’s.” Check out this post “The Truth about MS and Wheelchairs”

**There are more benign cases of MS than publicized. For example, a current starting point is to get specific data on DMT’s from reliable sources. On Page 13 of “The Use of Disease-Modifying Therapies in MS: Principles and Current Evidence” (The MS Coalition– http://bit.ly/1oEnTqY ), the colleagues point out that 50% of persons diagnosed will have “benign MS”. People with benign MS will have an Expanded Disability Status Score (EDSS) 6 and 23% had converted to SPMS.
Read closely, and always double-check hear-say. Another post to read–“Where and how to get your information.”

• Reaching out and accepting support from family, friends and the MS community helps immensely in minimizing stress. My physical, mental and emotional states were significantly improved. I wasn’t alone. Those that really want to help—let them and tell them how.

• Having a focus on overall wellness and health is a priority. When one feels better physically, one will also feel better emotionally and mentally. It is common sense but it’s amazing how many people lose sight of this. In addition, I take all measures to prevent flus, colds, sickness and injuries. These will lead to relapses, thus frequently resulting in MS progression.

• The advancements in research for treatments and a cure have been increasing exponentially. It WILL happen in your lifetime.

• The brain is a powerful organ, and it is gratifying that brain health is finally being addressed. The brain CAN be retrained and repair itself to a certain degree. I had symptoms for years that I no longer have.

I’m an ol’ MS vet, and there are many of us out there. We are folks who have lived and survived MS well for decades, and most would agree with what I just wrote. We know, and we are a positive group. And more positivity will also reduce fear.

It took me ten years to get over my fear of having MS; nowadays, that span of time should be much shorter. After all, it was still the dark ages for both MS and me between 1980 and 1990. Times have changed.

www.DebbieMS.com
Author, MS Counselor, Living with MS

Explaining MS Fatigue

November 6, 2014

Ninety percent of patients with MS suffer with fatigue. Fatigue is an extremely debilitating MS symptom and difficult to manage.

MS fatigue is more than being tired from a lack of sleep or a very busy day. It is a direct result of the disease itself, and is easily intensified by the other MS symptoms (such as extra energy required to walk), external factors (such as heat or dehydration), and health issues (such as colds/viruses, being overweight…).

Being an invisible symptom, fatigue is hard for people without MS to be aware of it, understand it, and realize the severe limitations it can impose on MSers.
I started an MS group discussion on LinkIn entitled “How do/would you explain your MS fatigue to people to try to make them understand it?” Over fifty comments were received to date, and here are some of the comments:

“I tell people that it is like the exhaustion you get when you have the flu- only multiplied by 20 and NEVER goes away…”

“I heard it explained once and it seemed exactly right. MS fatigue is using every ounce of energy in your body just to breathe.”

“Add 5 lbs. weights to both biceps, forearms, calves, thighs…etc.”

“There is no way to explain it properly. Everyone still thinks it’s just plain tiredness. They don’t get that fatigue is totally different. I once said “when I am fatigued and am in bed, sometimes I feel that peeing the bed is my only option.”

“I ask them to imagine they are coming down with a flu/cold, then recall how tired they are.”

“There is no explaining to others why my body needs to sleep when I have only been awake a short bit.”

“I liken it to hitting a brick wall so hard that you don’t bounce back but instead just slide to the ground and not able to pick myself back up.”

“People just don’t ‘get’ the difference between extreme fatigue and general tiredness – some think they are feeling the same as you are but they don’t know the half of it!!”

“Thank you guys so much for this discussion! I hear all the time “Well, I have trouble sleeping too… maybe you should just go to bed earlier.”Errrrgh! It’s not like that people!

“I tell them that my best day fatigued (tired) is like their worst day. Then they seem to get it.”

The truth is, most people don’t get it. But the upside is that our neurologists and peers DO get it, and that’s where we can get our comfort. And fortunately, fatigue is a symptom that is finally recognized by Social Security when applying for disability benefits.

For those that don’t get it, you can try handing them a copy of this post or a previous post of mine entitled “Fatigue and MS”. It never hurts to try.

www.DebbieMS.com
Author/MS Counselor/Living with MS

Where and How to get Your MS Information

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                                                  “Tips and Cautions”

The upside of the internet and social media is that mounds of information about MS are available immediately with the stroke of a few keys and searches. Folks need as much knowledge that they can get to help them understand and handle this complicated disease.

The downside of the net–besides being overwhelming–is that one has to be very careful with the validity of the source and information of what is read. I read discussions between MSers on Facebook, other social media, and MS Association sites and am concerned by how much info is misleading, incorrect, and cause for fear. Bad information causes bad decisions.

1. Understand which treatments/drugs help symptom improvement.

While it is gratifying that DMTs (Disease-Modifying Therapies) are reducing relapses for many MSers, participants in some discussions talk about how their symptoms improved when they were taking a certain DMT.

This is not true. Here is what one MS specialist-neurologist stated:

“The disease modifying medications do not directly help with symptoms in MS. these medications are to delay disability, slow progression and some can have improvements on MRIs. I can tell you that I have seen people in my clinic that had been doing well for years and so didn’t start any medications. But, then they had an attack that hit them quite hard. Then they wanted to go on a medication, “to get better. I told them that the medications are to keep from getting worse and not to make one better.”(see Source #1 below)

Now, there ARE drugs to directly and successfully treat symptoms (e.g. depression, bladder incontinence…), and relapses (e.g. steroids). These often improve symptoms and help a patient feel better, but not alter the disease course or direction of the disease itself.

2. No treatment exists today that will stop the disease activity/progression and damage completely, or reverses it. (see Source #2 below)

Recently, I followed a discussion on FB about stem cell treatments that miraculously accomplished this for them.  Most of the participants that had the procedure were diagnosed within the past two-three years. These participates probably did not know their personal pattern of relapses; it’s not uncommon to lose one’s sight or have impaired mobility for a long stretch of time in their initial relapses. Their recovery was more likely due to the relapse being over and they’re being back into remission with little residual, which is very common in the early years of the disease.

Furthermore, it takes a while for a patient to understand their own case of MS and how their body responds to a variety of things—both medicinal and non-medicinal. Nowadays, it is even more difficult since a newly-diagnosed person during their first couple of years are receiving DMTs and drugs for relapses and symptoms all at the same time. What is doing what?

3. Be careful with reading statistics, study results, etc.

I worked a number of years in my professional jobs doing financial analyses and market research. One of the things I know from that experience is that conclusions of studies can be misleading by what numbers are used and how numbers are presented. I’ve become quite the cynic about this.

For example, one might read “according this study, 50% of patients using XYZ showed a 38% reduction in…” How many people were used in the study, what were their characteristics, how long did they take XYZ, what were their side effects, who did the study, etc. You have to dig deeper, be cautious, use common sense and talk to your professionals when you hear something of interest and want to pursue it (like trying a new medication).

How would you feel if you discovered that a study was based on eight people?

4. When gathering information, consider the following:

• Use common sense and logic.
• If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
• Listen to your gut, not what you want to hear.
• There is no cure, and if something says you will be cured, throw it away. You can manage MS and even control it in many ways, but there is no cure yet.

5. What are good Sources of Information?

MS associations and Pharmas are good sources of information that can be trusted for acquiring basic MS knowledge about the disease itself, the symptoms, current research/events that are happening, and treatments that are available. They also can be helpful in providing programs and forums for people dealing with MS to get together and interact.

Where to use caution?

• When listening/reading information that MS associations, Pharmas, and neurologists present statistical information about study/treatment results. They all recommend DMTs as the first line of defense, and one has to be careful of taking this information at face value. Re-read #3 above, and know that numbers/statistics can be arranged to project just about anything. Dig deeper into what you are told. You may be surprised.

For example, a current starting point to get specific data on DMT’s is Source #2 below. And read closely. On Page 13, the colleagues point out that 50% of persons diagnosed will have “benign MS”. People with benign MS will have an Expanded Disability Status Score (EDSS)<3 after 10 years.  After 20 years they found while 51% remained benign, 21% had progressed to EDSS >6 and 23% had converted to SPMS.

The point? Stats like these could help a patient weigh their options more carefully.

• A standard line of advice is “consult with your doctor.” Do you trust your doctor? How experienced is your doctor with MS? Does your doctor listen to you and talk with you, respect your questions and doubts? If the answer is no to any of these, it’s a red flag. Remember that doctors get kickbacks, and truthfully are limited to prescribing drugs and giving referrals. Get second and even third opinions.

• Social media sites are wonderful for sharing information and feelings with other peers, but remember that two-thirds of effective communication is through body language. There is no eye contact, no voice to hear, etc. that can make judgment of people difficult. Learn the background of the people you engage with. If reading an MS blog, make sure it is a credible, respected and experienced person that is doing the writing.

Here is a link to my Resources/Links page on my website that is quite comprehensive, not overwhelming, and judged by many to be trusted http://debbiems.com/links-resources_271.html . (You can check out my background, experience and credentials in other sections of my site.)

(Sources)
#1 The NPR Diane Rehm Show (9/24/2012) aired “Diagnosing, Treating and Living with MS.” A panel of experts—neurologists/MS Specialists including a doctor who has MS—answered audience questions about diagnosing, treating and living with multiple sclerosis.

#2 The Use of Disease-Modifying Therapies in Multiple Sclerosis: Principles and Current Evidence http://bit.ly/1oEnTqY  September, 2012

www.DebbieMS.com
Author/MS Counselor/Living with MS

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